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Having a "sense of humor" isn't about being funny on demand. Instead, it's about choosing to be lighthearted, seasoned with grace and respect each other's perspective after years of sharing your life together. 

Here are a few nuggets to get your thoughts going:

1) Laugh with "each other", not "at each other" - respectful inside kidding, shared memories and gentle teasing will strengthen your connection. Stay away from sarcasm and mockery. Humor should feel safe.

2) Learn to "laugh at yourself". We do this quite often these days. "I can't believe I did this again!" Your self-awareness can turn your imperfections into bonding moments.

3) Don't make a "hill" out of a little "dot". Not every issue needs a verdict and yes, it's true, being right doesn't give you a medal. Lighten up and disarm the tension of making your point to be right.

4) Choose to be joyful "intentionally. Seasoned couples understand that laughter is often a decision, not a feeling, especially during stress and changes in your lives. Reminisce about funny mishaps, parenting moments and travel blunders that will bring a smile to your faces.

5) Have fun with each other. Watch a funny movie together, play a game, or learn how to "dance with each other." (if you have never tried it). It can be fun. (we are learning).

6) Keep 1 Peter 4:8-10 in view - "Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. 10 Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms." When mistakes happen (and they will), respond with mercy and humor rather than criticism.

7) Finally, keep G-d at the center of your joy. Trust us, He will keep your marriage fresh, exciting and happy even in your seasoned ages.

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